Newer posts are loading.
You are at the newest post.
Click here to check if anything new just came in.

November 05 2017

7487 cfd1 500


“We don’t have horses, we have a Chevy”

Dark Shadows (2012) dir; Tim Burton

November 04 2017


After a long day you come home and flick on the lights. Someone who looks to be a stereotypical vampire is fiddling with your remotes. Before you can speak, they simply say: “Did you know you have a piece of rug that says ‘Come right on in’ in front of your door?”

November 03 2017

0137 82a6

November 02 2017


Halloween is over and I am really down now.  I have to face that other impending Holiday and it bums me out every year.

8689 efa7


The apparent cause of death was a severe neck wound that resembled, in the words of one bystander, “a really gross hickey.”

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992) Directed by Fran Rubel Kuzui

8690 5871 500

November 01 2017

6546 244e 500


Inktober day 4, Midnight Snack

October 31 2017


On vampire movies, everyone seems well groomed even though they can’t see themselves in the mirror.

October 30 2017

6773 baab 500


at again

October 29 2017

1029 6f39



When someone asks me what’s wrong with this movie I show them this gif of Jesse and Lestat

I’m really impressed that you can tell how bad the acting is without sound. 

October 28 2017

5295 72d8 500

October 27 2017

6291 3245 500


Type of blood: really positive!

October 26 2017





you know what i really want? a modern dudebro vampire. just a typical obnoxious straight boy in a neon tank top and cargo shorts who also happens to be a creature of the night.

“okay, dude, i’m only feeding on you ‘cause i’m starving and there aren’t any hot girls around. no homo.” “wait, you’re gonna suck my blood?” “no, i’m gonna drink your blood. i don’t suck, that’s gay. don’t make this weird, bro”

“ah, i see you’re staring pensively out the window, chad. ruminating on the curse of your newfound immortality?” “nah man, it’s just… i got, like, some flecks of blood on my adidas while i was feeding and they haven’t come out…”

“we do not drink… wine.” “okay but is beer cool? and can we still smoke weed?”

he joins a 24-hour gym because being undead and allergic to sunlight is no excuse for skipping leg day. tragic music swells as he looks over his “sun’s out guns out” tanks (he has seven of them). his coven is a fraternity. someone make this happen


ask and ye shall recieve



October 25 2017

9331 eea7 500





It’s too late to kinkshame Lestat probably

i’m kinkshaming him anyway


Anne Rice is going to sue everyone on this post

October 24 2017

6907 fd05 500


Trick or Treating just got mutated. Who’s your favorite mutant monster?

October 23 2017

4372 e933 500


I think we drink virgin blood because… it sounds cool.

October 22 2017

October 21 2017

4393 443f 500


My friend in Sweden just bought some boiled beets.

Dracula hearts

4407 2295

October 20 2017


Me: *annoy husband with one too many puns*

Husband: “You can go. I disinvite you like a vampire.”

Me: “I don’t think it works like that. You gotta do spells and rituals to disinvite a vampire.”

Husband: “Hocus pocus get the fuck out.”

Older posts are this way If this message doesn't go away, click anywhere on the page to continue loading posts.
Could not load more posts
Maybe Soup is currently being updated? I'll try again automatically in a few seconds...
Just a second, loading more posts...
You've reached the end.

Don't be the product, buy the product!